More like a Stressful Sunday?!

I know today is not Sunday but I didn't post yesterday due to how I was feeling... in fact I haven't done half of the things I intended to because my body just wouldn't let me...

... I woke up yesterday morning thinking, "wonderful today is going to be a fabulous day". And then it all began... I was nursing Kawika and then he began to shake... his whole body shook and while he was suckling. In my concern I tapped his arm and tried to distract him from suckling so he'd stop shaking and look at me but he wouldn't stop... this lasted about 20 seconds but felt like forever. When he stopped shaking he was still suckling and sleeping... I pulled his eyelids open and he was in dream land... he was still suckling and then he pulled away and made a strange angry sound and the saddest sour face I've ever seen him make. Then he was his normal self for the rest of the day but that didn't stop me from worrying all morning while I took the 3 older children to church and left him at home with Tutu and Grandpa who were experiencing their own ailments.

Before we headed out the door to church for the zillionth time it seems we could not find Keiko's shoes. So I went bonkers looking all over for them and found one in the closet and the other under her bed. Because I was a frazzled mess, my dad told me to leave our 18 month old with him and take the older ones so I could concentrate on sacrament rather than keeping her under control. So I did :)

At least I tried to... between trying to keep Keiko, Bubba and Kanalu from losing it with laughter and beating each other up during such a reverent meeting. Which one of my most favorite women in Harmony Park Ward whom we were sitting right behind turned around after the meeting was over and said, "wow, your children are so quiet." So glad she never turned around to see me pulling ears and covering mouths and whispering threats in their ears.

On top of that ... the primary children sang during the meeting and Kanalu didn't want to go up and sing because his daddy wasn't there to sing to and while we were listening to them sing the most beautiful fathers' day song Kanalu started to cry because he was thinking about his daddy and how he's so far away... I was just crying because the words were so beautiful and it was a beautiful moment. Then at the moment I felt extremely tired and sick and weak. I almost just got up and left right then but I held on through the rest of the meeting and headed straight home despite Keiko's cries to go to nursery. My poor children :(.

I got home and collapsed onto the couch and tried to regroup myself so I could get up and have some water and take my meds... then I took baby Kawika (who I was still worried about) to my bedroom nursed him again and we both fell asleep for hours. I woke up in time to feed the kiddos dinner thank goodness and then I played on FB for a bit then fell right back to sleep for the night.... I am one totally worn out mommy of 5 whose husband is in Korea (not to mention that 2 of our 5 children are still in diapers).

So my poor father didn't really have a fathers' day because I was so out of it. I'll make it up to him today once I get my baby boy calmed down enough to make my dad a banana cream pie YUM!

I was so grateful for sacrament meeting to be able to renew my covenants with my Heavenly Father and to feel the spirit for a short moment in the day.

Today I found on FB through LDS Daily Thoughts this article and in this article I found this poem

Orin L. Crane had this need in mind when he penned the following lines:

Slow me down, Lord! Ease the pounding of my heart by the quieting of my mind. Steady my hurried pace, With a vision of the eternal reach of time. Give me, amidst the confusion of my day, The calmness of the everlasting hills. Break the tensions of my nerves With the soothing music of the singing streams That live in my memory. Help me to know the magical restoring power of sleep. Teach me the art of taking minute vacations of slowing down To look at a flower; To chat with an old friend or make a new one; To pat a stray dog; to watch a spider build a web; To smile at a child; or to read a few lines from a good book. Remind me each day That the race is not always to the swift; That there is more to life Than increasing its speed. (In A Third Treasury of the Families, ed. Ralph L. Woods, New York: Macmillan Co., 1970, pp. 427–28.)

So today as I looked back at yesterday... I read between the many little stresses of the day and concentrate the moments that were peaceful and perfect!

(by the way baby is fine... I dunno what that was all about but he's acting like his normal self since that moment.